Thursday, November 22, 2012

LIFELESS ...




Every night I feel the life draining out of my soul
It’s too hot inside and I wanna go out
 but I wanna stay in
I don’t like the lights
so I turn them off
Try to shut my eyes but my mind won’t shut
Tears won’t come out cos there’s nothing to cry for
The laughter is the only way out
If I could only remember what makes me smile
Fingers are shaking but it’s hot inside
So I go out into the winter
So they shake 
One more reason not to feel insane
Some call this depression
I call it lifeless
Yeah I’m breathing I know
But it’s not the same as knowing that I know
Everything’s blurry Amongst the fog, the mist, the smokes I’m blowing
Life is short but the night is long
Too long of thoughts, deep and dark
I want to go home but I’m home
The noise in this silence I hear in my veins
Nobody knows this trauma But my blood pours it out everyday
I don’t remember your name
Your face stays blank
Not the way I want it
But it’s best for the other side of me
Love has left me – buried itself deep within
Friendships are vague
No one really cares
Losing my mind, losing myself
Too many answers
For questions not asked
Bent too long My neck hurts
Still unbroken but turned
A thousand tosses but still not comfortable
Too many hates very few likes
Let the bitterness go away 
If only my soul could stay
I’ll give nothing to have it my way
Tomorrow is another day
Yet another day
To go through this cycle 
Cycle of lost
Amongst everything else
Is the valley of shadows
I’m hunting me Trying to find me Sinking in the boat I sail
Everythin else has bailed
Leaving me behind to do what I must
Smile at lifeLike it ain’t lifeless
I’m in this end till the very end

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